Re-post - 8.06

5 Ways to Show Affection

(Boy, I am going to butcher this one up.)
The other day S was talking to me about how there are 5 ways people show affection:

1.) Tokens: buying flowers, the candy, the car, the house, blah blah blah
2.) Physical: holding hands, kisses, blah blah blah
3.) Words: i *heart* you
4.) Time: ....time...
5.) Effort: making dinner, picking them up from work, blah blah

And when two people in a relationship, aren't aware of how the other person expresses themselves - that's when the miscommunication occurs.

i.e. I feel like my #1's are: physical and effort. i really enjoy holding hands or waking up next to someone. i really like to do the little things, like watching out to make sure they get inside the car or home or making sure their head doesn't fall through the crack of two pillows. with time and words really close behind. And if I look out for those with my partner but they associate differently, maybe w/tokens, then I'll feel like they don't care. (why doesn't he like to hold my hand? why doesn't he kiss my hand during movies anymore?) he'll reciprocate w/buying me flowers and i will think he doesn't care. that's what you call two completely separate pages.

I never thought of it this way. Looking back at past relationships, it made sense to me.