Trinidad & Tobago

My family isn't happy with my leave. It saddens me that they are not supportive about my upcoming self-exploration.

At Cal Poly, I took an Ethnic Studies class. One of our final projects was to write about one of our family members. As I'm cleaning out my apt, I found the story of my mother's journey to the US. She was 19 y.o. and by herself....how fitting...she's the most disappointed...

"I Came from Trinidad and Tobago"

M speaks with a slight Caribbean accent as she thinks back to her earlier days. Born in Trinidad and Tobago in 1951, M came by herself to Oakland in 1968 as a foreign exchange student. While going to college, she worked part-time as a bookkeeper in Oakland's Chinatown, where she met her future husband and married him in the early 1970's. In the late '70s, she started to sponsor the rest of her family to immigrate to the US. She stopped work and school after giving birth to her first child and two more children later. 14 yrs later, M returns to college to complete her education. However, after her husband caught an illness for 4 consecutive months, she was depended on to bring in financial security. She got a job as a word processor and is now working as an administrative assistant at the UC President's Office.

Family Roots in China

I was born on April 18, 1951 in Trinidad and Tobago. Trinidad and Tobago is an island right off the coast of Venezuela and is smaller in size than California. I am the oldest of 4 children. Both of my parents were born in Canton, China. My father, JY, moved to Trinidad and Tobago because a friend of his had asked for his help in starting up a business there. My mother, P, gave birth to an illegitimate child in China and lived by herself in order not to tarnish her family's name. She found it extremely difficult to raise this child properly within sufficient resources, so she moved to Trinidad and Tobago as a picture bride. My mom was a full-time homemaker while my dad worked in several different occupations, such as a clerk in a grocery store, a traveling salesman, and eventually a worker in a Laundromat. He also taught Chinese in an attempt to keep the customs and traditions from being lost.

Coming to America as an Exchange Student

Overall, life in Trinidad was hard. The economy at the time was poor; jobs were scarce; and opportunities were virtually nonexistent. Staple food shortages happened many times.

My mother was constantly told of America and all that it offered. She felt that if we stayed in Trinidad we would always have the same problem of food shortages. In her eyes the only real solution was to go to America, where education and employment opportunities were abundant. P decided that she would first send me, her oldest child, to America. The plan was to send me to American on a student visa as soon as I finished high school. My mother spent months trying to convince one of her long time childhood friends in Oakland to take me in. They were extremely hesitant since they were both retired. They did not want to have the responsibility of caring for a child, but eventually they soon caved in and gave their consent. Everyone was excited when the time for my departure finally came. My siblings saw this as an open opportunity for them to come to the great land of America. My parents were very pleased with the idea and fully supportive and sent financial aid for my schooling and board.

I arrived in America on June 3, 1968, landing at the SF airport. The first thing that caught my attention was the weather. It was the middle of summer, and the weather in SF was about 30 degrees cooler than what I had been accustomed to back in Trinidad. It took me months and bundles of clothing to finally get accustomed to it.

In Oakland's Chinatown

I settled in Oakland's Chinatown with an elderly couple. The couple, in their late 70s, was very old and fragile. H was disabled as well, so their lives consisted mostly of watching television and inviting visitors over every once in a while to play mj.

In Trinidad, Chinatown was hardly noticeable and consisted of only half a blcok. However, in SF, Chinatown was so large. There were tall buildings, towering hills, and crowded tourist gift shops. The number of Chinese in one place at the same time was also something that took some time to get used to. It took me a while to become comfortable with the environment, so it would not feel alien to me anymore.

I was also unfamiliar with many of the Chinese customs celebrated in America. In Trinidad, they did not celebrate Chinese New Year to the extent that it was taken in America. Although my mom talked about all the celebrations in China, we would only celebrate with an extra special dinner. I was amazed at all the details and efforts put into the customs here. I spent my first Chinese NY watching the SF's Chinese NY parade on TV. I later on spent my NY like this one. I was finally able to see the parade in person years later after I was married.

College Years

I began Heald College as a full time student in 1968. Since I was a foreign student, my tuition was very high and I needed a job to support my schooling. Uncle H was able to help me get a job as a bookkeeper through his ties in Chinatown. Soon, I was going to school 6hrs/day and working 3 hrs/day.
I contemplated moving back to Trinidad many times because I felt so lonely. Although I had my weekends free, I couldn't spend them as I wished because I lacked companions. I met people in my classes but didn't communicate with them outside of school. I also met a few co-workers but also didn't associate with them outside of work. Because my caretakers were so much older, they did not go outside of the home often, so it was very difficult to explore the new country. My most memorable experience was when I would go fishing with Uncle H and A. Uncle H was very fond of sihing and went 1/month, so this was one of the regular activities I was able to look forward to. I decided in the end that staying in America was the only way I could better provide for my family and myself, so I soon overcame my doubts.

After two years, my visa was about to expire. In order to stay in America, I transferred to Laney College in Oakland where I stayed for another two years. While attending Laney I met my future husband by being introduced through Uncle H and A. After a courtship of about one year, we were married.

Marriage and Family Reunification

I married E in 1972. After deciding that I no longer wished to pay the outrageous foreign exchange student rates, I dropped out of school while waiting for my residency papers to return. In the meantime, I was still working, but my hours increase and I became a full time employee. After waiting many months for the papers to come through, I decided to just to keep working full time for month. I quit two years later with the arrival of my first child. I had two more children, arriving two years and five years later, respectively. I was not comfortable leaving the children with any one outside of the family, so I decided to become a homemaker and full time mom.

I played a key role in the advancement of my family into America. When my mother had first decided to send me to the foreign land, they had hoped that I would serve as their guidance and help them settle in. In the late 70's, my family started to settle in. G, my brother and also the second oldest in line, traveled alone to America after he completed high school in '76. He was able to stay with my family and provide baby-sitting services while he attended a nearby college. He moved out and was on his way immediately after he received his college degree, b ut still remained in the same city. The next to arrived were the last two siblings, my two sisters, A & E, whoe brought along with them their husbands and settled within the same city. My parents did not arrive until the early '80s. They wer already retired, and often needed assistance from their children. Therefore, they settle within two blocks from my sisters.

Back to College and Work

During the later half of the '80s, my thoughts drifted to the unfinished business of obtaining a college degree. I decided to return to college when my first and second children were safely tucked away at school. At first, I only took one course at a time because my responsibility of taking my 4 y.o. took up a lot of time. I stayed at home with a small number of classes for the next four yrs until I came back to the work force. My decision to go back, even with a total absence of 14 yrs, was strongly influenced by the fact that my husband was sick for 4 monthsand it became imperative that we earn more than one income. I began applying and finally received a job as a word processor. From my job I was able to build up my skills and qualifications and started meeting the right people. This led to my promotion as an AA in the UCOP Office.

I currently work at the same job where I have been for the last 7 yrs. After many rejected job applications due to my lack of a college degree, I have reached a turning point. However, I can not go any further; though I have the experience and qualifications. I am constantly being denied. This is what has motivated me to go back to school. As of now, I am working full-time, while taking 16 units of night school at Cal State Hayward, where I stand as a senior. I hope to graduate within the next yr.

Thinking back to all the opportunities I have encountered here in America, I have no regrets of coming here in 1968. I have three kids and a husband, and I have also brought the rest of my family over to the US. I have a solid, yet growing education. I have a stable yet limited job. All of these opportunities and outcomes would not have been available to me or not to the extent if I stayed in Trinidad and Tobago.